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“A dozen of his favorite movies, 17 of his favorite bands, a million examples of what he liked to eat, read, do. ’ it’s obvious all he wants to do is porn chat,” says Wendy.
It was overwhelming.” The flip side of the over-sharer is the losing lothario who opens with, “Hey, are you naked right now? “That’s not just wasting my time and yours, it’s actually making me angry. He actually reads her profile and decides he might want something more; that she might be the one?
The family could not be reached by the paper either Thursday or Friday for further comment, according to the story.
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“What I would honestly tell you, flat out, is that just because don’t care,” says Wendy.
“Just because someone looks cool and has a good sense of humor doesn’t mean that a woman who clearly states, “I’m looking for marriage and children” is going to respond well to you … ’ doesn’t cut it, but something like, ‘I can’t believe you met Ryan Gosling!
Nothing is more annoying than a guy who takes shortcuts.” She cites the following example: “Say I spend an entire paragraph talking about how one of my loves is spending time with my sister and rolling around with her two boys. ’ I’m like, ‘Can’t you even be bothered to read the whole profile? If the other person’s profile says, ‘I’m looking for long-term,’ and all you’re after is hooking up, give it a pass.
’ Or, I’ll have stated that if you do any drugs at all—even pot—you and I will not be a match, yet I hear from guys who are clearly into partying.” Wendy’s cardinal rule for online dating is this: Don’t waste your own time and don’t waste other people’s time. Similarly, if you want something more serious, and all she’s into is random play, move on.” Next: Scaling it back [pagebreak] The problem for many younger guys when choosing appropriate potential partners, notes Wendy, are “the shiny factor” and “single focus self-involvement lenses.” The most frequent offenders, in her experience, are twenty-somethings just looking to hook up or find some instant gratification. “They see a tremendous rack in one of my pictures, and they’re mesmerized, and I get the IM or email.” (In fact, commenting on a woman’s physical attractiveness right off the bat can actually be a turn-off, according to Robinson, since it can be read as superficial.
“If your handle is Scooby Doo, I don’t know what your name is, so when you’re introducing yourself, please tell me your name upfront. ‘I saw your profile and found such and such really charming, or I saw that you like to hike and I just came back from hiking the Appalachian Trail.’” Adds Robinson, “Referencing her profile shows that you read all the way to the end, and care enough to pay attention.” 3.